Every week, Bill lays down his own laws. Here is the latest set of New Rules from the last episode:
New Rule: Someone must explain to General Petraeus that just because you're wearing camouflage while getting blown, people can still see you!
New Rule: Now that we've learned so much about General Petraeus, General Allen and everybody else involved in this mess, every nation must acknowledge that when we say we have the greatest f**king military in the world...we mean, "We have the greatest f**king military in the world."
New Rule: [slide of man with Romney symbol face tattoo] Someone has to explain to the guy with the Romney face tattoo that even if Mitt had been elected and he had created 12 million new jobs, none of them are going to a guy with a face tattoo.
By Bill Maher
Did the ability to raise an infinite amount of money in this election make a difference?
If you just paid attention to the Presidential race, then you might think the answer is no. But that's because the Presidential race is unlike any other contest in the country. People take it personally. They're invested in it. They'd seen Obama for four years and they'd seen Romney on Jay Leno and the cable shows and the debates. People in swing states may have been drowning in a bukkake-like stream of Romney and Obama ads, but it's not like those ads were providing all of their information.
But when it comes to state contests and ballot propositions, people generally don't know much beyond the ads, so in those races money isn't just the main thing, it's the only thing.
Prop 37 went down in defeat because $48 million was spent to defeat it. This was a proposition that asked the simple question, "Wouldn't you like to know what you're putting in your mouth?" Before the ads started running, something like 90 percent of Californians who answered were for Prop 37. Now, they're against it. They're against knowing what they're putting in their mouth.
It's not that the anti-37 ads were particularly convincing. They didn't make any real arguments. It's just that there were so many of them. I saw them on Hulu when I watched old episodes of "My Favorite Martian." People keep complaining about the repetition of political ads, the same ad over and over and over, but that's the whole point -- it's hypnosis. That's how hypnosis works. The same thing. Repeated over and over. And over again. The same thing. Repeated over and over. Again. Repeated. And before you know it, you think you're a chicken. Or you don't care what's in your chicken.
By Bill Maher
Fox News and the radio meat-puppets and the crank blogs are obsessed with Benghazi. It could be bigger than the Fast and the Furious scandal, and by that I mean a thimble full of flyshit no one cares about who's not on the take.
The Obama haters want revenge for how we said Bush was asleep at the switch for 9/11, so they're going to prove that Obama either ignored Benghazi, or lied about it afterwards, or possibly ordered it himself.
And that's why he looked so tired in the first debate. He'd just gotten back from Libya, where he'd been firing mortar rounds at his own men.
Why Romney Lost
By David Frum (November 16, 2012) - "In Why Romney Lost David Frum, a former George W. Bush speechwriter, delivers a forthright analysis that offers a bold, hopeful plan for Republican success in the years ahead. David Frum urges a Republican party that is culturally modern, economically inclusive, and environmentally responsible--a party that can meet the challenges of the Obama years and lead a diverse America to a new age of freedom and prosperity." (Newsweek ebook)
David Axelrod is a former senior advisor to President Obama, senior strategist for President Obama's re-election campaign, and will be the Inaugural Director of the University of Chicago's Institute of Politics. He is also laying his mustache on the line in order to raise money for epilepsy research. Get more info at Slash the 'Stache.
Eric Idle is a writer, reader, husband, father, dog owner, sillographer, guitarist and football fan, whose latest special, "What About Dick?" will be available for download on Nov. 13th. Check out his latest musings on his blog.
Ana Navarro is a CNN political contributor and former National Co-Chair of John McCain's Hispanic Advisory Council during his 2008 Presidential campaign. She recently shared her election takeaway with GQ.
David Frum is a Contributing Editor to Newsweek/DailyBeast.com. His new ebook Why Romney Lost (And What The GOP Can Do About It) will be available on Nov. 13th.
Michael Moore is a filmmaker and author of Here Comes Trouble. On the heels of the election, he wrote an editorial saying that voters' decision to give Barack Obama a second term and to send more women to Congress was "a total rebuke of Neanderthal attitudes."