New Rules: September 21, 2012

New Rule: Stop digging up new historical evidence that Jesus was married. Look, he never had any money. He used any excuse to hang out with the guys. And when death came, he welcomed it. What more do you need to know?

New Rule: It's time to name that gold, bamboo banquet chair the international symbol of having a shitty time. It could be a charity event, an awards ceremony, a wedding reception. If it involves sitting on those chairs, you had better get high before you leave the house, because you're in for a long evening.

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Overtime: September 21, 2012

Bookshelf: September 21, 2012

Joseph Anton

By Salman Rushdie - (September 21, 2012) "On 14 February 1989, Valentine's Day, Salman Rushdie was telephoned by a BBC journalist and told that he had been 'sentenced to death' by the Ayatollah Khomeini. For the first time he heard the word fatwa. His crime? To have written a novel called The Satanic Verses, which was accused of being 'against Islam, the Prophet and the Quran'. So begins the extraordinary story of how a writer was forced underground, moving from house to house, with the constant presence of an armed police protection team.

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Guest List: September 21, 2012

The Interview:

Documentarian Eugene Jarecki will join Bill in-studio at the top of the show. His latest film, 'The House I Live In,' explores America's War on Drugs and the criminal justice system. It opens in theatres on October 5th.

Twitter: @DrugWarMovie

The Panel:

Rana Foroohar is the Assistant Managing Editor and Economic Columnist at TIME Magazine. In her recent Curious Capitalist column for TIME magazine, Foroohar addressed why the stock market is booming while the rest of the economy is underperforming.

Twitter: @RanaForoohar

Roger Hedgecock is a nationally syndicated conservative radio talk show host and former Mayor of San Diego. He has been critical of President Obama's foreign policy, asserting that "A prairie fire is indeed burning through the Muslim world, led by Islamic radicals, encouraged by the American left and deadly to Americans in its path."

Twitter: @RogerHedgecock

Chris Matthews  is the host of MSNBC's 'Hardball' and author of Jack Kennedy: Elusive Hero. He made headlines recently for his on-air battle with Republican National Committee chairman Reince Priebus, which Bill Maher weighed in on with his "Birther Control" blog post.

Twitter: @hardball_chris

Literary icon Salman Rushdie, whose latest book is Joseph Anton: A Memoir, will join the panel mid-show. The New York Times recently profiled the book and included a brief Q&A with Mr. Rushdie.

Twitter: @SalmanRushdie

Behind the Screens: September 14, 2012

By Miles Leicher

Check out what went on behind the scenes of the latest Real Time:

New Rule: Anon Starter

Credit Canard

By Bill Maher

A recent PPP poll asked Ohio Republicans, "Who is more responsible for the killing of Osama bin Laden?" 38% said Obama, 15% said Romney, and 47% are unsure. I'd like to know the thinking behind that 15% for Romney -- do they think he’s a secret Navy SEAL or something?

It would have been funny to ask who's more responsible for Obamacare, Obama or Romney, because if they said Romney, they might be right.

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New Rules: September 14, 2012

New Rule: Mitt Romney must never again make reference to what he might wear or not wear to bed. And Ann Romney must let us know if it's true that when Mitt gets sexually aroused, it sounds like this: [sound effect of modem call connecting]

New Rule: Now that we've passed the 11-year anniversary, we must all learn the final lesson of 9/11 and stop obsessing about 9/11. In 1986, most people had let Vietnam go. In 1952, people weren't constantly referencing Pearl Harbor. And in the years since the Civil War, nobody...[slide of protesters carrying Confederate flags]...oh, never mind.

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