Loophole Queens

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By Bill Maher

It turns out, according to Republican tax reform, a “loophole” is any tax deduction taken by a person. No, I’m not being fair. A “loophole” is any tax deduction taken by a person who isn’t Eric Trump. There’s no such thing as a business loophole, so there’s nothing to close (which is why the new tax plan doesn’t).

“Loopholes” aren’t what businesses use when they move their headquarters to Ireland, or billionaires use when they bank in the Seychelles. Those are strategies. “Loopholes” are what people use when they want to deduct their mortgage interest, or medical expenses or student loans. Paul Ryan was being perfectly clear – we just weren’t listening. “Loopholes” are for bums. Mitt Romney’s 47%. The freeloaders. And unified Republican government, as expressed in this tax plan, is when they finally get what they deserve. 

Here are some more “loopholes” the House tax bill would close: moving expenses, alimony, tax preparation costs, electric car tax credits, nursing homes and the deduction when your house is destroyed by a tornado. Right now, grade school teachers can deduct $250 a year for school supplies they buy themselves. Loophole queens!

But here’s the really terrifying thing about the Trump Tax Plan: it’s not that it appears to have been drafted by Eric Trump’s accountant; it’s that it seems to have been written by politicians who aren’t afraid of ever losing an election. There’s no other explanation for a tax bill that’s such a transparent wealth transfer from millions and millions of middle-class Americans, who tend to vote, to corporations, which can’t. Is the system so fixed that voters don’t scare them anymore?