Who’s Your Baghdadi?

By Bill Maher

We finally got a look at ISIS leader Abu Bakr Al-Baghdadi, in a 21-minute video of him delivering a sermon in Mosul. Or as we here in Hollywood call that – a pilot presentation.

Draped in black robes that The Guardian said, “invoked a distant, almost mythical phase of Islamic history,” Baghadadi told his followers, “I am not better than you or more virtuous than you. If you see me on the right path, help me. If you see me on the wrong path, advise me and halt me. And obey me as far as I obey God.” In other words, I feel your Muslim pain.

Like it or not, you’ve got to give this guy props for making a fairly decent debut on the world stage. The rocket launcher has been passed to a new generation.

And I hate to say it, but Hillary Clinton could learn a thing or two from him when it comes to being more mysterious. Baghdadi is a mystery wrapped in a riddle, wrapped in a turban. There were only two known photographs of him and a very brief personal profile on OKCupid. When Baghdadi finally did come out, he was dressed in black, which has a thinning effect. Plus Baghdadi is also way more high-energy than Osama bin Laden and looks pretty good in high def. Meanwhile, US intelligence officials have put a ten million dollar bounty on Baghdadi’s head. When are we going to learn that these folks can’t be bought, or reasoned with?

In fact, Baghdadi’s new international presence could hurt Hillary Clinton on the campaign trail and boost Joe Biden’s credibility. Biden once called for separating Iraq into three regions and Baghdadi is actually doing it. Ironic, because nobody in America ever listens to Joe Biden.