Pyramid Scheme

By Bill Maher

"Who will buy this wonderful feeling?" -Oliver/General Dynamics

With everything happening in the world -- terrorism, disease, Reese Witherspoon going all "Onion Field" on our cops -- it's easy to lose track of what's really important. Like Egyptian economic reform. But don't worry, you're paying for it whether you pay attention or not.

Earlier this year, as The Sequester kicked in, Secretary of State Kerry announced that we still had $250 million to give the Land of the Pharaohs for "economic reform" -- against $1 billion, if we like what we see. The loan and the "economic reforms" are essential for Egypt to qualify for another loan, this one for $4.8 billion, from the IMF.

Who funds the IMF? Oh, that's you again. Over 17 percent of the IMF's funds come from the United States.

The Sequester also won't stop us from sending whoever's in charge in Egypt 20 F-16s and 20 M-1 Abrams tanks, a total prize package worth over a billion dollars, addressed to Occupant.

Weird how that tank keeps coming up.

Right-wing kooks and conspiracy loons think Obama loves Egypt because he makes Michelle wear a hijab around the house, but it's actually more banal than that. America is basically Chrysler, only instead of minivans, we make this tank. And we need someone to buy it, and this is our version of 0% financing. Because Egypt is much more than a semi-modern, semi-moderate, squint-and-you-can-believe-it's-true frenemy in the Middle East. It's also a customer.