Derision Points

By Bill Maher

Why do the taxpayers have to foot the bill for polishing George W. Bush's image?

Dubya calls his new presidential library, which opens to the public today, "a place to lay out facts." I call it a 250 million dollar revisionist history lesson. The museum pays tribute to all of President Bush's greatest failures, from Iraq to Hurricane Katrina. Visitors can pull up briefing materials, videos and maps on a glass-topped Defending Freedom Table, right next to the Choking-On-A-Pretzel Recliner.

According to the New York Times, the Iraq War exhibit says that, "No stockpiles of W.M.D. were found.” But then adds, “Post-invasion inspections confirmed that Saddam Hussein had the capacity to resume production of W.M.D." I'm sorry, but I don't remember that. How can he resume production of something that was never there in the first place?

Then there's something called the Decision Points Theater:

In a new brick-and-limestone museum, visitors to an interactive theater will be presented with the stark choices that confronted the nation's 43rd president: invade Iraq or leave Saddam Hussein in power? Deploy federal troops after Hurricane Katrina or rely on local forces? Bail out Wall Street or let the banks fail? 

Invade Iraq or leave Saddam in power? Who was demanding Bush make that choice? Nobody who wasn't insane.

It's like one of the questions in that "Would You Rather" game the kids like to play. Would you rather have your ass in the front, or a nose shaped exactly like a penis? You know, one of those "stark choices." Leaving Saddam in power wasn't a choice Bush had to make any more than leaving Tony Blair in power was.

But what's really galling is that, like with all presidential libraries, US taxpayers are on the hook for the day-to-day operating costs of Bush's Selfie Memorial. According to USA Today, "the federal government will spend more than $68.7 million this year on programming, operations and maintenance of 13 presidential libraries."

If you're looking for entitlements to cut, let's start with building shrines to douchebags. George W. Bush was not King Tut; he was President of the United States, and a lousy one at that.