by Miles Leicher
Chinese President Hu Jintao is in the U.S. this week to meet with President Obama and top administration officials. Among other things, Obama is expected to use this visit to confront China over their human rights record, currency manipulation and why, when one bulb on a string of Christmas lights goes out, they all do. At least I hope that comes up...it drives me friggin' nuts.
If it doesn't, it's probably because Obama has other things on his mind; namely, the fact that House Republicans just unanimously voted to repeal that dang "job-killing healthcare law." And three Democrats joined them, just to be d**ks. Newt Gingrich went so far as to call "Obamacare...a centralized health dictatorship." Luckily, no matter how hard I try, I can't seem to come up with something that sounds less threatening than a "health dictatorship." Besides, the fact that Newt hates it so much makes me think that it's probably okay. Next time you're trying to tell the difference between Newt Gingrich and an actual newt, keep in mind that one is a frog-shaped reptile with slimy, toxic skin...and the other is a newt. Never stop learning!
The good news is that everybody - Democrat and Republican - agrees that this health care repeal won't go anywhere. It's little more than an attempt to paint the Democrats as job-killers before the next election, so that they might take over the Senate and repeal the bill for real. They'd better hurry up though, because as more people figure out what's actually in it, the more they're going to want it. Basically, it's the opposite of hot dogs.
According to www.healthcare.gov, the provisions in the current law include:
- Prohibiting Denying Coverage of Children Based on Pre-Existing Conditions
- Prohibiting Insurance Companies from Rescinding Coverage
- Eliminating Lifetime Limits on Insurance Coverage
- Appealing Insurance Company Decisions
- Offering Relief for 4 Million Seniors Who Hit the Medicare Prescription Drug "Donut Hole"
- Providing Free Preventive Care
- Cracking Down on Health Care Fraud
- Extending Coverage for Young Adults
- Holding Insurance Companies Accountable for Unreasonable Rate Hikes
And those are just a few of the provisions that are already in effect, with most of the bill being implemented over the next three years. They're like appetizers, but good for you.
Hey, are you trying to pass the time until Friday's show? Well you're in luck because our Production Manager, TJ Baldino, recently come up with a nifty little game called "How Long?" All you need in order to play it is a tape measure and friends.* One person holds the tape measure and pulls out a random length of tape, carefully keeping the numbers hidden from the other players. Everyone else has to guess how many inches of tape have been pulled out. The person with the closest guess wins. Too easy? Try centimeters. You should be able to play about three rounds before people start to hate you. Good luck!
*If you do not have friends, try using subordinates. If you don't have either of those, you're probably resourceful enough to find a way to play on your own.